The Ultimate Get-a-Clue Freelance Request for the Week of April 18, 2011
One of my favorite fellow freelancers, Katharine Swan, had her B.S. detector on high alert when she forwarded this week's Middle Finger Award winner to me. She presciently copied the project in its entirety, suspecting it would be flagged, which in due course it was.
Project Description: Volunteer Article Writer (Denver)
Specific Project Request: Are you a passionate about writing? Have you been told that you have a way with words?
Yeah well, I don't, and that's my problem.
What I DO have is the ability to create great web pages and drive traffic to them. I love creating designs and layouts and writing the code. Where I am weak is content development. So here is my idea. I am looking for a content writer or wordsmith to create interesting content for me to post on my website. Typically they are 500-750 word articles on a wide array of topics and subjects. In exchange for your content creation, I would like to feature you and your work as an expert author on the site. I would like to market your articles on the web. In the end, I envision being able to help you get into freelance writing if you want to do that.
Now, I am looking for a very specific kind of person. This is of course a nonpaid position, so if you are expecting to feed to feed a family of four or even just yourself, then this is not the right opportunity. If you are looking for a hobby, something to do in your spare time, then I would love to hear from you. You might be either a student, or retiree, or someone else who has nothing else to do and wants to do something fun and creative.
I'm passionate about a lot of things, jerk, but I happen to get paid for them when I provide them to anyone other than charities, family members or friends. As for hobbies and spare-time pursuits--well, I certainly don't engage in them so that others can profit from my budding talents.
But I'm feeling generous today so I'm gonna help you out a little in the 'way you don't have with words' department. You know that Screw You! line that goes, "This is of course a nonpaid position, so if you are expecting to feed [sic] to feed a family of four or even just yourself, then this is not the right opportunity"? Give it another shot. In particular, substitute the words 'nonpaid' and 'expecting to feed a family' to an antonym and then try again.
Labels: Middle Finger Award
posted by Irreverent Freelancer @ 8:19 AM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Oh gawd, another "Buy into my dream and join my labor of love!" plea. What the hell is with these people? Do they not understand that dreams cost money to implement? Either write the stupid things yourself or don't bother with the website.
"I would like to feature you and your work" - I'd much rather you realized the value of my work and PAID me, you jerk.
I told the manager at Kroger's I was passionate--and he said, "So?" But I sure hope someone takes this and further lowers the respect and fees paid writers. Perhaps someone who needs this twit's help to be a writer.
Oh, for Pete's sake. One clueless person preying on another. "I like to build websites and drive traffic to them!" Well, if you're driving the right traffic to them, then you can afford to hire a writer. "But I want someone who isn't already a freelance writer and just has nothing better to do!" Well, then you can expect to get crappy content that doesn't draw search traffic, because someone who just needs a hobby doesn't know anything about writing compelling content (social site) or SEO (search traffic).
I'm just wondering if "I want to market your articles" means that s/he is clueless enough to think that works, or if s/he is assuming applicants are that clueless?
I would love to respond in an email with the following, "Now, I am looking for a very specific kind of job: one that pays. Since this is, of course, a nonpaid position, please take this opportunity to shove it. If I were looking for a hobby, I wouldn't be seeking paid work, would I? Here's a suggestion. Go play in traffic, okay?"
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